The picture above is a sign reading “peace” on a mound of dirt next to the lake I walk our dog around. I’ve seen it before and even watched the man who put it there stroll down, but this week it hit me a little different as I think peace is what many are searching for.
I find myself like many others not having words for the events of recent. So this post is me doing some processing and figuring out how to move forward. I’m sharing this to let others know that it is okay to not know what to say or how to say it, but stilling quietly is still an action of inaction. Being a passive part of history is not something I want. So let’s process together.
All the events of 2020 and now into 2021 are unprecedented for everyone. Taking it all in can be difficult. If no one has told you this, let me be the first. IT IS OKAY TO CHANGE YOUR MIND WHEN YOU GET NEW INFORMATION. (Yes, that needed an all caps rage.) I’ll admit that this time last year when COVID started in China, I did not think it would be a big deal. After learning the severity of the disease and reading the new trials/scientific literature, I began to see that my initial thoughts were incorrect. As I continue to learn from multiple sources, I’m sure my opinions about how to best care for myself, my family, and my patients will continue to evolve. I think growing and evolving ourselves and our thoughts is one of the most valuable things we can do to benefit ourselves and our communities.
In fact, many people have told me, “you’ve changed” or “well, you used to do this”. My response now? That’s cool, thanks. If someone remembers me a certain way and only wants that Lindsay, then I’m sorry to leave you behind because I’m committed to growth. Part of my growth journey has included learning more about American history. Some interesting things I’ve learned: Many who lived in England during the Revolutionary War thought those living in America were whiny and ungrateful for what England has done and will do for them. (Sound familiar?) The current sheriff’s start we still use today originated as a symbol from the slave patrol. During the Civil Rights Movement, the US covered up the separation issues to the rest of the world and painted only beautiful pictures of black and whites together while attempting to shift focus on the space race. Martin Luther King’s “I have a dream speech” was influence by singer, Mahalia Jackson, encouraging him to put his notes away and share his dream. Interracial marriage was outlawed from 1664 (first by a colony in Maryland, before it was Maryland) to 1967. Crazy things! Learning all this made me acknowledge the privilege I experience and how much I still have to learn.
As a Christian, I believe in loving everyone. I needed to check myself to ensure I’m doing that. Sitting quietly while others suffer is not loving them in my opinion. So I’m here to show up all the while knowing I’ll get it wrong. I’m here to state my current beliefs knowing some might disagree, and I welcome a good discussion. On the other hand, hate has no place here.
So my current thoughts, COVID is real and tragic for some who get it. Watching people die alone in the hospital is heartbreaking. Please socially distance, limit interactions, wear a mask, and get vaccinated when you can. Black lives matter. End of story–If a group feels so oppressed to have to single themselves out to have that acknowledged, we as a community should check ourselves. I don’t condone the looting from some of the riots, but I feel I’m finally to begin to understand why some chose to take that path. LGBTQIA lives matter. I’m still learning much about this particular area, but I’m trying knowing that I’ll get it wrong especially in the beginning. Our veterans matter so much, and I cannot imagine the things they endure. The service of police is amazing, but they should be held accountable for their actions. The Capitol building rioters succeeded in further separating a divided nation that needs to heal. Indigenous people can teach us so much about our spirits and the Earth. I want to be a better listener especially to those that don’t look or think like me.
The only way to grow is to step out of my comfort zone. So this is me stepping out and offering a space of love and grace because it was freely given to me. Lord knows I need it so I intend to share. Finally, I will conclude with a set of verses read frequently at weddings, but I think it would do us all a large amount of good to remember these words in every single interaction we have.
If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears.11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13 (NIV)
Greater Than 